The End Of The World, Parts I and II

King5: The group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals wants the flyswatter in chief to try taking a more humane attitude the next time he’s bedeviled by a fly in the White House.

TGDaily: Global warming is irreversible, U.S. study concludes […] And while temperatures in the U.S. have risen in line with the rest of the world, scientists now believe that temperatures in the U.S. are “very likely” to rise much faster than the global average down the road.

I thought someone had routed my browser to The Onion when I saw both of these, but no – these are the real deal.

PETA wants people to be more humane to flies. I expect a press release from them to protect maggots next and for people to stop wiping your bottoms with toilet paper, instead asking your feces to politely peal away from your skin, because after all: there’s organic matter in shit that may need humane treatment.

On the global warming bit… I’m simply appalled. During the Industrial Revolution, America was completely reckless in producing waste and disposing of it poorly. Over the last 30 years we’ve dropped levels of pollution one hundred-fold. Yet this report thinks that even though we’ve decreased our waste that our own special space of global warming is going to rise faster than the rest of the world. Faster than China and India who are producing waste at the levels we used to in the reckless, “early” days of business. Maybe we should wipe our asses with the report instead of toilet paper after all…

Someone needs to slap both of these groups like Obama did that fly – it’s truly most humane thing we can do for both groups.


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