Stupid Drivers Are Universal

Over the weekend I was driving down a major local road and nearly had an accident. I was in my Jetta and going down a left-turn-only lane, past a bunch of cars that were stuck behind a slow moving tanker in the right lane. As I was turning left, I was where I was supposed to be, but a guy that was stuck in the slow traffic opted to change lanes. He cut out in front of me, sans signal of course – hell, he didn’t even look in the lane! – causing me to swerve and stay on the other side of the road, while he took off down the left-turn-only lane. He still ended up behind the tanker, and was sworn at in at least three languages, and I got out unscathed aside from a rare bit of road rage. I do take some solace in the fact that stupid drivers are found everywhere, as BWG points out.

7 thoughts on “Stupid Drivers Are Universal”

  1. *yikes* Glad to hear you and your Jetta escaped car accident doom. My neighborhood in Los Angeles has a bumper sticker saying “I survived driving in _____” because we have THE WORST drivers who think they are still driving in Asia where driving rules seem to be non-existant. (Anything goes??!) Thanks, as always, for your comments. I’m glad the pinkies are there too ;)

  2. Ah, that’s driving in Europe too – I think only the Americas have strict driving laws (LA and NYC not withstanding) given the stories I’ve heard and driving I’ve seen. I wouldn’t touch a car in either Milan nor Hong Kong! And yes, intact pinkies in his line of work is the highest praise I can think of! :D

  3. Yesterday, we spend our Easter Sunday driving down to Mass to spend the day at my wife’s grandmother’s and do the big family thing. Girls are all dressed up, and we have an hour’s drive probably ahead of us. So we take off in the morning, and I grab my coffee, and we hit the highway.

    Now, the lucky part is, is that for the first 20 minutes, we’re on a three lane road. Traffic tends to flow nicely, and everyone is happy. But then after that it turns into just two lanes for a good half hour, through the busiest part of the highway. So here you are, stuck choosing the lane that has the least amount of retards in it. You get in the left lane, and try to set the cruise for a comfortable speed, just to find the idiot in front of you doesn’t know how to use his cruise control. So he starts out at 75, then down to 60, then up to 75, then back down to 60. So you look for a clear spot, and get in the right lane to try to make it past him on the right, but then he decides to do 75 again. So as you’re quickly approaching the next car in front of you in the right lane, you find yourself going faster and faster, only to have this fucking tard in the left lane speeding up as well, yet just hanging in your blind spot. So you slow down quickly, only to have to switch back into the left lane and get stuck behind the same fucknut.

    The next cruise control retarded prick you run into is the one that as you’re finally in the clear, and have your cruise set for 75-80, he comes flying up behind you. So as not to be like the previous fucking retard, you pull into the right lane to let him get by you, just to have THIS son of a bitch do the SAME FUCKING THING the last guy did, and just hang in your blind spot keeping you from getting back into the left lane, until finally you come up on more right lane traffic that forces you to slow down and get into the left lane behind the moron, just so he can do the same fucking thing the first guy was doing to you.

    Someday, and you can all mark my words, I WILL have a hood mounted rocket launching system. And when I do… watch for me on CNN.

    As posted at

  4. I hear all of you. I live in AZ and I do get my share of stupid fucking idiot drivers! What I have seen is that most of the time they wait until you get close to them then they turn in front of you and slow down, of course while talking on the cell phone! My recent encounter was somewhat different, I was behind this bitch in a white sedan from CA (Hope she is reading this) and the light turns green. She is barely moving since she is trying to dial her cell phone. I hunked at her and she flips me! Now I really started understanding why some drivers get shut! Because if I had a gun I’d shoot the stupid bitch! And it is legal in AZ to carry a gun :-) (Hmmm…). Anyway, I got so pissed off that I flipped her back and really felt like raming my jeep into her ass! but then I figured she’d probably sue me. I wish I had a gun with me and blown her fucking head off! I think I’m going to start carrying one ;-)

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