A Dip In The Nostalgia Pool

New song from Jesus H Christ Band: “Connecticut’s For Fucking”.

Just heard it on Sirius’ Alt Nation… a little too accurate for my liking, or at least it just tapped a whole lotta memories at once.

Lyrics after the jump, and yeah, the liquor stores do close at 8pm.

We live in the dullest state

Package stores all close at eight

Malls are full of optometrists

And restaurants we hate

Swimming across Lake Quassapaug

Stealing makeup, catching frogs

Cutting our feet on broken bottles

As we wade in the Shepaug

It’s true for horses, cows and dogs?

Connecticut’s for fucking

That’s all there is to do.

I love to listen to classic rock

and have sex with you.

Doing hole shots at the mall

Writing Ozzy on a wall

Watch the corn get tall

There’s nothing else to do at all.

Goin’ where we always go

Doin’ what we always do

Waitin’ to turn into the people

We are bound to turn into.

What else do other people do?

Connecticut’s for fucking

It’s the Nutmeg state

If we can’t afford to buy antiques

then we just copulate

Connecticut’s for fucking

And Massachusetts too

I want to climb up the sleepy giant

and have sex with you.

Up in Fairfield

In Old Lyme

We’re just fucking all the time.

Out in Derby

Down in Kent

We’re all busy getting bent

In the Constitution State.

Connecticut’s for fucking

While we’re waiting to

Turn into the people

everyone here turns into.

Connecticut’s for fucking.

There’s nothing else to do.

I wanna listen to classic rock and have sex with you.

We all love to fuck in Connecticut.

We’re all getting fucked in Connecticut.

Let’s fuck!

by Jesus H Christ Rocks

12 thoughts on “A Dip In The Nostalgia Pool”

  1. iTunes has it and there’s a clip of it on the JHC web site… of course, I wouldn’t have even bought it normally: Sirius will play it to death by the end of next month!

  2. Really? They pushed it ahead an hour? I was actually thinking about it this weekend – went to buy beer on a Sunday ;)

  3. finally, i found some people who heard of this song! it’s amazing. im glad they also butt in Massachusetts in the song because fuck yeah everything closes here so goddamn fucking early for example starbucks. it closes at 8! i moved to MA for school and damn i wanted to get some starbucks and it closed at fucking 8! back in jersey it closes at midnight. this song tells it all! I love itttt

  4. Ahhhh, welcome to New England there Jersey girl :) Well, sorta, since I’m not in either place anymore… far from it, altho I DID interview at a place in Waltham once.

    Anyway, remember that you can’t buy beer in MA on Sundays: key for college living. And don’t head to CT or RI for it: go north to VT or ME. I WAS going to send you to Boston to Torrefazione Italia – for coffee that’s a step up from Starbuck’s – but it looks like closed down their retail stores! That sucks! Was like going to my [Italian] Aunts’ houses… sorta like a Sorprano’s scene, too, except ya know. Different.

  5. ehhh im trying to think positive and hopefully ill get to meet some people who dont like country like myself. everyone here is kenny chesney crazed. serenity now! — btw did u comment on my blog about forrest gump?

  6. Well I do like Kenny (spent one day too long in Tennessee) but I would NOT have fit in when I was there – that’s a recent and strange change, I must say… Stay positive and shouting serenity now does help. Honest. At least it should scare the weaker skiddish souls away!

    And yep that was me – couldn’t help myself. I’ve been telling women for years that Jenny was a user – they always yell at me and say I’m not romantic enough. meh. I gots romance. I just call’m like I seez them.

  7. Grew up in Fairfield and I didn’t get F*^$ked til I went to school in DC (Lot’s of heavy petting at Jennings Beach though). Musta been cuz the packies always closed at 8. Who the hell knows what they’re doing that nite before 8?

    P.S.. Anyone know whatever happened to John Valvie — the Prince of Porn? Used to play New Haven clubs.

  8. Randy, liquor stores in Mass ARE open on Sundays now, no need for the trek to NH. Fuck Connecticut, and trying to bringing Massachusetts down with them. That is some shit.

  9. Ah spiff. When did they open up on Sundays? Cuz I know it must be somewhat recent…

    Funny, tho “trying to bring Mass down with Conn”. You make it sound like y’all have been selling booze at all hours for decades. Nice try, buddy. Hell, you guys were burning witches just 300 years ago. I mean you CAN still talk about Salem right?

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